Res. Life and the City #8- Growing Up

"When you're a teenager, all you want to do is buy beer. But once you hit 30 all you want to do is to get carded." ~Carrie Bradshaw


The last few months in my new exsistence, I've started to realize something. I'm not getting mistaken for a student anymore. Yes, I realize that this doesn't mean that the world is coming to an end and that I should be aging gracefully, but damn if I want to get older! I don't know if it has something to do with what a typical student looks like at my new school (i.e. they just stepped out of a magazine) and what typical students looked like at my old school (i.e. they just stepped out of a corn field), but I am treated much more as a professional and I think I am seen as such on campus, which was not the case when I was in grad school.

Maybe it has to do with the fact that we aren't allowed to wear flip-flops at my new school. Maybe it has to do with the fact that I was often seen with a backpack and iPod earbuds while walking to and from class, study sessions, or paper-writing in the library last year. No matter the reason, I can't tell you the last time I was treated like a student, asked to see my ID, or not given the respect I deserve as a professional from the start of a conversation. While it makes me happy that I am seen and treated as a professional, there's a small piece of me that holds onto the hope that someone will ask me what year I am or what my major is at the start of a conversation.

This lack of mistaken identity led to an interesting conversation with one of my colleagues last night. We were making a joke about "RD's Gone Crazy" type of behavior and he said "Well, we aren't in college anymore" and I countered with "But we ARE in college! We're in a college setting right now!" The dichotomy of being surrounded by people who are overwhelmingly younger than you while not succumbing to behavior made me think about how student affairs professionals are constantly surrounded by immaturity and always expected to rise above it. When I think about my college education, the stress was always put on the "world after college," but what happens when your own personal "world after college" is actually a world within a new and different, but somehow hauntingly familiar setting?

I think student affairs professionals can often find themselves in a Catch-22. To be honest, we don't know what it's like to be "in the real world." While I can't speak for other functional areas, I think this is especially true for people who pursue Residence Life careers. We have no concept of rent, or utility payments, and often don't have to pay for meals or groceries. We don't have to face a daily commute or road rage. Additionally, what real-world community do you know of that brings in poets, artists, politicians, activists, dignitaries, sporting events, social justice events, musical performances, or theatrical opportunities for minimal to no cost and is located within a 5 minute walk of your house?

While we seem to have the best of both worlds, I have found myself dealing with my very "real-life" issues within this collegiate bubble. I have seen too many students dealing with real-world pain and issues the past few months to think that we are living in a drama-free zone. The last time I was on duty, I assisted with a student who intentionally overdosed on prescription pills and there was a major car accident on campus last night that one of my collegues had to respond to as the main Housing official on duty. Although I like to think of myself as still being college-aged from time to time, the moments of sobering reality when helping and assisting students through difficult times always make me come back to Earth. I've decided that the ultimate goal for me this year is to balance the crazy college girl that's deep within me that just wants to have fun and the beginning professional who has to deal with crazy college girls within her own community.


"In the end I decided I was definitely 34 going on 35, but in a city like New York, with its pace and its pressures, sometimes it's important to have a 13-year-old moment. To remember a simpler time when the best thing in life was just hanging out, listening to records and having fun with your friends. In your very own apartment." ~Carrie Bradshaw